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Writer's pictureClyve Rose

Love on the Lam

While elopement today is just an efficient way to skip the in-laws’ endless guest lists, in the Regency era, running off to marry was tantamount to declaring war on polite society. Let’s explore the wild world of illegal matrimony, with a spotlight on the not-so-charming practice of kidnapping an heiress and forced marriage - a topic that looms in the background of The King's Mistress.


Elopement: Scandal on the Run

In Regency England, eloping wasn’t a romantic getaway; it was a full-blown social scandal. The Hardwicke Marriage Act of 1753 made sure of that, declaring that all marriages must include witnesses, parental consent for underage couples, and a proper ceremony in a parish. Feel like skipping any of these steps? Congratulations, you're now an outlaw in the eyes of society - and potentially your own family.

In Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, Lydia Bennet’s elopement with Mr. Wickham isn’t just teenage rebellion; it’s a catastrophic humiliation for the Bennet clan. Austen captures the social fallout when Elizabeth reflects on the disaster: “Lydia—the humiliation, the misery, she was bringing on them all…”. Elopement didn’t just sully your own reputation; it dragged your entire family through the mud.

But why was society so appalled? Historian John Mullan notes that elopements were “the stuff of local gossip” and it was believed that such hasty unions often ended in what artist John Collet called “Discordant Matrimony” — a marital mess complete with wayward husbands and neglected children. In other words, elopement was viewed as the fast track to domestic disaster.

PS: An unhappy home was usually considered the fault of the wife and mother (some things never change, huh?).

When romance turns criminal

Now, if eloping was frowned upon, kidnapping an heiress was outright felonious - at least when it came to property laws. Yes, property. Eloping could be prosecuted as theft, if the potential groom was apprehended in time.

A well-dowered young lady was considered her family’s asset, and abducting her was like stealing a prized thoroughbred. The hue and cry would be raised, and if caught, the culprit might face the noose.

Not because of the trauma inflicted on the lady, mind you, but because the thief had nabbed the family’s financial asset. Chivalry, it seems, was dead long before modern romance novels.

Regency law had an unsettling loophole: kidnapping a woman wasn’t a crime if the perpetrator married her fast enough. Or rather, the family was less likely to pursue redress through the courts. They would prefer a hastily hushed-up marriage to the scandal of a daughter deflowered out of wedlock.

Once the marriage was consummated, fathers had little legal recourse to annul the union unless he was prepared to face scandal, and the social ostracisation of any other daughters. Their daughter had transitioned from being the property of her family, to being her husband’s property. Justice, thy name is patriarchy.


Gretna Green: the Regency Era

For couples desperate to bypass England’s draconian marriage laws (see below), Scotland’s Gretna Green was the destination of choice. Just a hop, skip, and a carriage ride across the border, Gretna Green offered quickie weddings with minimal paperwork - no parental consent required. The village blacksmith often doubled as a makeshift officiant, hammering out marriages alongside horseshoes over his anvil-altar. Romantic, right?

Still, a Scottish marriage didn’t guarantee acceptance back in England. Many families insisted on a second ceremony to salvage their reputation. After all, if the bride’s virtue was presumed compromised, what choice did they have?


Legalities & Loopholes

Under the Hardwicke Marriage Act, elopements and unauthorised unions were, legally speaking, a hot mess. The Act stipulated that for a marriage to be legal the following had to occur:

  • Witnesses: At least two credible witnesses had to be present.

  • Parental consent: Couples under 21 needed the green light from mum and dad.

  • Proper venue: No sneaky back-alley ceremonies; marriages had to take place in a parish.


The Act’s primary goal was to protect young heiresses from being "trapped in dissoluble marriages." Ironically, it also made elopements more tantalising to rebellious daughters.

Elopement’s real crime lay in its social repercussions. As Austen demonstrated in Pride and Prejudice, Lydia’s impulsive act was a public relations disaster for the Bennets, requiring intervention from Mr. Darcy (and his wallet) to resolve.

Artists like John Collet captured society’s disdain in works like Modern Love. Through a series of satirical paintings, Collet traced the journey from “The Courtship” to “The Elopement” and, inevitably, “Discordant Matrimony.” The message? Quick decisions in love often led to long-term regret.

Collet's Discordant Matrimony, painted in 1765.

Whether fleeing to Gretna Green or dodging the law after kidnapping an heiress, illegal marriages in the Regency era were quite well-known.

Elopement wasn’t just a scandal; it was a direct challenge to societal norms and existing property laws. So, the next time you watch a period drama and swoon over a runaway couple, remember that behind the romance was a lot of legal red tape and a good deal of pearl-clutching. Sometimes, even an unwilling bride.

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